Costco Soulmate Trading Outlet and Enron Corporation Partner to Extend
Financial Reach in Early FY2002
Enron Corporation Turns to Costco Soulmate Trading Outlet For
401k and Bookkeeping Guidance
BLACK ROCK CITY, NEV. - February 8, 2002 - Costco Soulmate
Trading Outlet, Inc. (Burndaq: CSTO) the leading provider of low
cost quality soulmates, today announced a strategic partnership
with energy giant Enron. "Enron will take advantage of Costco
Soulmate Trading Outlet's expertise in the areas of employee
satisfaction, public relations strategies, re-branding,
and basic checkbook balancing in an admittedly difficult
financial and political period," said Softie Softerson,
Corporate Plumber and Director of Hot Water and Public Relations
for Black Rock City's premier soulmate retail and wholesale
outlet.
The arrangement was announced from the nation's capital
steps just prior to a third day of congressional questioning,
arising from the bankrupt energy trader's economic downturn.
During the previous day's testimony, under questioning before
Congress, former Enron Corp. Chief Executive Jeffrey Skilling
shouldered no blame for Enron's lower than expected fourth
and first quarter performance and said he had no reason to
believe it was in financial trouble when he left last August.
"I was at Burning Man, to be honest," Skilling said, "exploring
exciting partnership opportunities with Costco Soulmate
Trading Outlet CEO Rico." Skilling added that a 'Fresh
Start' for all displaced Enron executives and employees alike,
has been realized via a partnership with the Costco Soulmate
Trading Outlet.
Grilled by a congressional panel probing off-the-books
partnerships and creative pro forma accounting at what was
once America's seventh-largest company, Skilling said he was
"devastated by and apologetic about what Enron has come to
represent, but looked forward to interviewing prospective
soulmates naked at the Burning man festival later this year."
Costco CEO, Rico, commenting via satellite link from
the corporate headquarters, stated that not only do the displaced
Enron workers offer a great growth opportunity for the retailer,
but increases it's base of soulmates significantly. "Workers
these days don't worry about being fired or laid off, but
about being 'Enron-ed.' Politicians wonder about 'Enron-izing'
the economy. Financial experts talk of 'Enron-itis' when
discussing the shock effect the company's demise has had on the
market," Rico said. "We felt it essential that the process of
'Enron-mating' be offered as a option to a growing market
demand. This is a thrilling partnership. We'd like a chance to be
America's seventh-largest company too. Except we, like know how to balance our
checkbook and stuff."
Brenda Lynn, VP of Human Resources, added that Costco looked
forward to welcoming its new employees to the Costco family.
The increase in employees, an addition of as many as 4600
assimilated former Enron employees, up from 346 employees
in 2001, would dramatically increase the reach of the Costco
Soulmate Trading Outlet. "This is a great swelling in our
membership," said Lynn. "This kind of impressive growth
embodies the spirit of Costco. In the current hard economic
climate, some companies find their growth flagging, while
others continue to grow. We find these examples of corporate
virility very exciting."
About Enron Corp.
Enron Corp. markets electricity and natural gas, delivers energy and other physical
commodities, and provides financial and risk management services to customers
around the world. Enron's Internet address is
www.enron.com.
About Costco Soulmate Trading Outlet
Costco Soulmate Trading Outlet (Burndaq: CSTO) is the leading
provider of low-cost, quality soulmates in Black Rock City. For
more information on the company and its products, visit the
Costco Soulmate Trading Outlet Web site at
www.thespoon.com/costco.